Sunderland mum diagnosed with breast cancer during pregnancy inspires fundraising

A Sunderland mum who battled the trauma of breast cancer and surgery whilst pregnant has inspired fundraising to help other women.

Kelly Ross-Nesbitt, 39, from Fulwell, thought a lump in her armpit may have been down to her pregnancy when she discovered it whilst putting on her bra in September last year.

Her husband Simon, who she'd married just eight weeks before, convinced her to get it checked out - but little did they know it would turn their lives upside down.

"I actually apologised to the doctor for wasting his time when I went to see him at first as I really thought it was nothing," explained Kelly. "But when he felt it, he fast-tracked me for a biopsy.

"I still genuinely didn't think it was anything other than pregnancy."

When the results came back, however, doctors at Gateshead's Queen Elizabeth Hospital had to break the news to Kelly and Simon that she had stage three breast cancer, which had spread to her lymph nodes.

A month later, whilst 32 weeks pregnant, Kelly had to undergo a mastectomy to remove her left breast, with a midwife keeping a check on the baby throughout.

Then, at 38 weeks pregnant, she was induced so that doctors could start chemotherapy as soon as possible.

Kelly gave birth to a healthy, baby boy, Rudy, who's brought much joy to the family as they navigate the trauma of cancer.

Whilst wanting to spend bonding time with her newborn, Kelly had to embark on gruelling rounds of two types of chemotherapy just two weeks after giving birth, before 15 rounds of radiotherapy, which she completed in July.

"Rudy is thriving," said Kelly. "Everyone says stress is the worst thing in pregnancy and I spent most of the pregnancy worrying about how he would come out, he'd been under anaesthetic, gone through surgery with me, but he was perfect.

"He's the most placid, happy baby. I'm so grateful to have him, but it's also difficult because it's unlikely we'll be able to have another because of my treatment."

Now, Kelly, who works as a health care assistant, is dealing with getting her medication, the final stage of her cancer treatment, right after suffering the side effects of Tamoxifen, including extreme fatigue and brain fog.

She is also hoping to have her right breast removed so that her body is more symmetrical.

"Physically, to look at, I look better to people because my hair has grown back," said Kelly. "But I actually feel worse now because of the medication."

As well as the physical side effects of cancer, it, of course, impacts on mental health and body image.

And Kelly said spotting a candle while she was away on a break which showed a female figure with one breast really struck a chord.

"I saw one on a candle stand and I actually cried when I saw it, to actually see my body represented," she said. "Processing this whole thing is the hardest thing of all."

Kelly mentioned it to one of her best friends, Donna Cope, who owns candle company, Kohji and it's led to a candle to raise funds for charity.

Kelly said: "It really fits in with Donna's brand which is about empowering women and nurturing who you are."

She added: "I never in a million years thought I would need charities related to cancer, but I am so grateful they exist and to everyone who donates to raise awareness and support people on their journey.

"As well as hopefully one day finding a cure for cancer. One thing I would say is: please check your chest and breasts regularly. Learn what is and isn’t normal for your body in general and any thing suspicious, GET IT CHECKED."

A Scent For An Inspirational Lady

Donna Cope was so inspired by her close friend of 12 years determination in the face of adversity that she's created a charity candle to help raise awareness and funds.

Donna 38, from Elba Park, set up Kohji Candles in lockdown and specialises in hand-poured candles made with natural ingredients and soothing essential oils, which are vegan and cruelty-free.

Her candles are already popular in the wedding industry where they are used for tablescapes and as favours and she decided to craft a candle in Kelly's honour to raise funds for Breast Cancer Now.

Blended with notes of Lavender, black pepper and rose essential oils, the candle is shaped in the female form with one breast to try and help normalise bodies of women who've had to undergo mastectomies.

Donna said: "I have two kids myself, so I know how difficult those first few months can be. I can't imagine how difficult it must be going through that as well as cancer.

"Kelly is such an inspiration. And she really shows how losing a breast is nothing to be ashamed of. I really hope it helps remind people to check their breasts, too.

"What Kelly has gone through has certainly inspired me to do that. I actually did find a lump last year and went to get it checked, which I wouldn't have given a single thought to had it not been for Kelly. You don't really think about cancer until it comes knocking at your door.

"Thankfully, it was nothing, but it's so important just to check."

:: The A Scent for an Inspirational Lady candle is priced £12.99 from KohjiCandles.com with £3 from each sale going to Breast Cancer Now via the website's Go Fund Me page. Extra donations can also be made here.