Once I die this is what to do
When I shuffle off this mortal coil there will be two types of mourners, those who know everything about me and those who didn't know me that well.
So what’s the point of a lengthy service at the local crematorium that will force relatives and acquaintances to decide whether to attend or not or to wear black in misery or colour to celebrate my life?
I have asked my children to arrange a direct cremation, which means there will be no service.
They can contact everyone in my mobile phone to advise them of my demise and ask three things of them: Have a glass of champagne to send me on my way; make a donation to an animal charity of my choice and most importantly perform a random act of kindness to a stranger in my name.
I see no need to pay emotional and costly attention to my dead body.