I struggled with my mental health says mother of child with SEND after setting up support group for other parents

The words of parent Tracey Huggins whose daughter Delilah was given a special educational needs and disabilities (SEND) diagnosis and after struggling with her own mental health and navigating the support minefield for children with SEND decided to set up a support group for other parents.

Tracey said: “Becoming a parent to a child with additional needs is difficult, between the systems we navigate, the opportunities and we try to give our children and then trying to care for ourselves - it is exceptionally hard.

“It’s tough enough the first day you leave the hospital with your new-born. Even if you are seasoned pro, you find yourself just looking at them in the car seat thinking I hope I don’t mess this up.

“But it is okay, because you have midwives, health visitors, and support, unless they have additional needs.

“I struggled significantly with my mental health due to navigating the system for Delilah, always feeling like I cannot do right for doing wrong or not doing enough or too much.

“I had no one I could turn to and be honest with about how much I was struggling. I used to attend a coffee group and always felt everyone had a handle on things, and I didn’t. I would feel like I didn’t fit in with the clique. I felt I wasn’t enough.

“I felt that I didn’t have a choice, but have to suck it up and get on with it.”

After experiencing her own struggles since Delilah was born in 2012, Tracey and husband Dan set up the support group to help ensure other parents of children with SEND don’t have to go through the same ordeal.

The community interest organisation offers a space for parents to share information, the difficulties they may be experiencing, as well as being directed to the right avenues to access support care services and funds.

They also provide a counselling service for parents.

One of the group's counsellors is Hayley Harrison who also joined the group after experiencing her own challenges after her son George, five, was diagnosed with autism and global development delay.

Hayley, 32, said: “At the time I didn’t have any idea of what to do and didn’t know anyone who had life experience of this situation.

“It seems like there is a lot of support for children with SEND, but nothing for the parents.”

Hayley joined Choice, where she is now a director and has played a pivotal role in the creation of a series of guides to support parents of children with SEND.

She added: “We have created a Yellow Pages style 200 page guide for parents which acts like a directory under listed topics which allows you navigate SEND and get access to the support you need.”

Tracey added: “We have a curated fact checked information booklets to help you at any point in your journey. It’s a fully supportive service, regardless of your child’s diagnosis - exactly what I needed and never received.

“We truly want to give parent carers a choice over their lives and not be just riding the ripples of the drop in the ocean, which is the children.”

If you are a parent of a child with SEND and need support, you can contact Choice via the contact page on their website. You can also email Hayley at [email protected]