CHILDLINE: Even friendships can have a negative effect on young people

For children and young people in school and online these friendships can be even more important to their social development and mental health.

But sometimes, friendships can have a negative effect.

Peer pressure can change the way we behave, even without us recognising it. Sometimes for the better, like echoing a friend’s politeness or being recommended a book, film or musician who quickly becomes a favourite.

However, it can also see children and young people pressured or coerced into negative behaviour, such as not attending school or acting in a way that could get themselves or someone else hurt.

Our Childline volunteers hear from young people who find themselves pressured into drinking, smoking, taking drugs, bullying others, losing weight or changing their appearance. Some young people our team speak to have been persuaded to share sexual messages or images or to have sex in an effort to ‘keep up’ with their peer group.

Our advice to young people is to remember it’s okay to say no to things if you don't feel comfortable or safe, even if it might be to make someone else happy or help you fit in with a group. You have the right to choose what’s best for you, even if it’s not what other people think is best.

If you’re a parent or carer who is worried about a young person experiencing peer pressure, remember it can be difficult for children to start a conversation with you about their experiences, so it’s important to listen calmly and reassure them.

Remind them that they have the right to make their own choices, and real friends should accept whatever decision they make.

There’s a lot more information on peer pressure on the Childline website, and young people can speak to our counsellors on 0800 1111. They can also use the Childline website’s moderated message boards to speak to others their own age about how they have dealt with similar situations, and they can speak directly to our counsellors through the site too.