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School daze
As most children in Sunderland are heading back to school today, we found out how parents will cope with a suddenly empty home
A child's first day at school – be it nursery, primary or secondary – is a big step and can be traumatic for both parents and children.
Parents are faced with an empty house while children are thrust into a whole new world away from the arms of mummy.
There are, however, steps you can take to prepare them, such as talking to your child about school and helping to develop their practical skills.
Your child may be anxious about what to expect on the first day at school.
If so, one way of helping them is to talk through their fears:
* explain where they'll be going, what they'll be doing, and for how long
* answer questions, and iron out any fears by asking what they think the school might be like
* emphasise the things they may enjoy doing
It's important not to dismiss the child's fears – things that seem obvious or silly to an adult can seem like terrible obstacles to a five-year -old.
If children have a good idea of what school is going to be like and have already experienced learning activities at home and in other settings, they're less likely to find the experience stressful.
Games, role-plays and reading at home can help a child get into the right frame of mind and boost their confidence.
Activities for your child could include:
* playing games that involve taking turns or speaking in front of a group
* playing with children of a similar age to develop social skills
* reading books about starting school
* using your child's favourite toys to role-play going to school
* painting and drawing, which involve sitting down for short periods of time
It's worth noting that if you have younger children who are strarting in the future, there are steps that can be taken in the weeks proceeding the big day.
In the run-up to the first day of term you could:
* involve your child in choosing things they need for school such as school bags or uniforms
* visit the school with your child so they become familiar with the building and the local area
* some schools have arrangements to support your child's transition into school which you may want to enquire about
* establish a routine and discuss what might be happening at school at different times of the day.
Netmums, the UK's biggest parenting website, is launching a campaign called First Day Mums to offer practical and emotional support and advice to mums who have a child starting school this week.
Mums will be able to log on as soon as they've dropped their child off at school, to find support from everyone from nutritionists to life coaches and careers advisors to stylists to help them cope with the practical and emotional changes that First Day Mums experience.
Netmums.com founder Siobhan Freegard said that the first day is a monumental moment in a mum's life – and it can also be quite unsettling, even sad.
"For many it's the first time their child is no longer reliant purely on them and many struggle to cope with this change," she said.
The website provides mums and dads around the country with easy access to other parents and share their experiences or get advice.
Siobhan said: "It is good to know that you're not the only one experiencing these emotions. When your first child goes to big school it is really emotional because it is your baby and you worry that they will be able to eat on their own or go to the toilet themselves."
Netmums is designed to support parents through these difficult changes but it is also there to remind them that this is a key time in their life and they can now focus on themselves.
Siobhan said: "Mums will now have more time to look at what they want to do, like going back to work or taking on extra hours, basically just remembering they are not just a mum.
"I have three children and my youngest started school last year and I remember thinking what am I going to do.
"My first thought was shall I have another baby as there won't be any more little ones around, but my husband soon put a stop to that."
Siobhan has learnt over the years that it is important to control your own anxiety on that first day as children do pick up on it.
She said: "You have to watch your own anxiety. My youngest was begging me not to leave him and it was heartbreaking but now he runs into school and high fives his friends in the playground.
"That first day is nerve-racking but you have to be confident that you have given them enough love and stability to let them go a little bit."
She added: "The website wants to show mums what a great achievement getting their child to school actually is and provide them with plenty of useful advice, learned from experience, to ensure the transition to 'school mum' is as smooth as possible."
Read more in today's Echo
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Weather for Sunderland
Thursday 24 May 2012
Today
Sunny spells
Temperature: 10 C to 19 C
Wind Speed: 10 mph
Wind direction: North east
Tomorrow
Sunny
Temperature: 8 C to 18 C
Wind Speed: 12 mph
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