Dad’s Life: ‘I refused to take part’

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ISAAC’S new wardrobe is a thing of beauty.

So it should be. My wife has been thinking and dreaming about it for months.I’m just please it’s finally in place.

Despite her best efforts, I’ve had nothing to do with it. I refused to take part in the initial reconnaissance missions at stores. I knew it would be a waste of time, and I knew we would end up at Ikea.

So I stayed at home until the day, after weeks of traipsing and humming and harring, my wife informed me that Isaac’s new wardrobe would come from Ikea. I nodded sagely,

Isaac was determined to have his say in the great wardrobe debate so had courageously accompanied my better half on her frequent forays. He is yet to learn the Ikea lesson.

Anyhow, my wife then asked if I would help her assemble the new wardrobe. We both laughed at her joke then she phoned a friend who is extremely handy at all things DIY.

I resolutely did nothing while the bangings and crashings went on upstairs, only venturing upward to provide coffee and reassuring words.

Even my battle-hardened wife wouldn’t have managed to have overcome the construction obstacles without the help of our experienced friend, but eventually it was complete.

And it’s a real bobby-dazzler of a wardrobe – with shelves and everything. Isaac is really impressed and has re-shaped his whole bedroom.

“Now,” said my wife, “about Gabriel’s room.” I feared what was coming next, but was pleasantly surprised.

“He’ll be away to university in two years time, so there’s no need for him to get a new wardrobe.”

I didn’t entirely follow this logic. Seems to me if the lad’s current model isn’t doing its job properly then two years is a long time to survive a malfunctioning wardrobe.

However, 16-year-old Gabriel wasn’t bothered (he is a teenager after all).

And funnily enough, neither was I.

FINALLY, the boys are back at school. They both returned, all clean and spruce, this morning after having had what seems like the whole summer off.

Gabriel was keen, eager and ready to return. He starts the sixth form today, and his school insists they have to wear suits. not uniforms. I know I’m biased but Gabriel looked very handsome and grown-up in his new blue suit, crisp white shirt and blue and pink striped tie. Like something out of a magazine.

Isaac, on the other hand, was neither keen nor eager to return to school.

Indeed, Isaac couldn’t have been less chuffed.

He could find no plus points at all, and he said the only thought that kept him going was the thought of another break in four weeks time.

Perhaps I shouldn’t have told him that it was more like six weeks.

l A few readers have asked how Gabriel did in his GCSEs. In my last column I was awaiting his results. He did well, eight A*s and two As. Thanks for the interest.