Stuff the banks altogether
On a daily basis, we are told the world's financial system is on the brink of collapse.
So you would automatically assume that the beleagured banks would actively encourage the opening of new accounts, especially ones that are putting cash into the bank, rather than withdrawing it?
Well, you would be wrong.
I took Nick to open his first current account on Saturday. After lots of research on the Internet, we found a young person's account that gave interest and, more importantly, had no overdraft facility (temptation is a dangerous thing).
So, armed with birth certificate, passport, household utility bills, etc, we went into a main branch, expecting to be welcomed with open arms.
Instead, we were met by a woman who told us it wouldn't be possible to open an account at the moment, but we might be able to at another branch.
Looking around a deserted bank, with staff sitting behind their computers without customers, I questioned why.
After humming and haa-ing, she finally asked: "Do you have an account here?"
I didn't and unfortunately, that gave her a solid reason to say no.
"Do you have another family member who does?" she asked.
Luckily, my mother does, so the clerk advised that we bring her over so she could "vouch" for Nick. Now, extracting my mother from her house is a tricky prospect and frankly, the whole idea seemed ludicrous.
We made our excuses and left, with me ranting down the street. I sincerely hope that Nick opens an account at another bank and grows up to earn a fortune.
That will mean that my "big mistake" speech from Pretty Woman at the door of the bank will not be in vain (when a similarly hatchet-faced woman refused to serve Julia Roberts, only for her to have Richard Gere's unlimited credit card to spend with).
I remember as a kid opening my bank account with a 1 note and no fuss.
Thirty-odd years on, I still have that same account.
You'd think the banking fraternity would actually welcome new customers in such troubled times? Or maybe that's one of the many reasons why the financial system is in such turmoil now.
Perhaps we should stuff our cash under the mattress and stuff the banks altogether.
Now that Nick's back playing football, we had to take him to get a new pair of astroturf boots for training.
Unfortunately, he chose a pair that make me feel nauseous. They're the colour of a fluorescent green highlighter and have a texture that reminds you of a clammy frog.
Awful is not the word, but he thinks he's the bees knees in them.
"They're mint," he keeps repeating.
"No, they're snotty lime green," I keep replying.
Thanks to the kids for another lovely Mother's Day. I was very spoiled with chocolates, candles and bath products and had a smashing meal out – the biggest treat of all – not spending what feels like all day Sunday constantly feeding others!
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Weather for Sunderland
Friday 10 February 2012
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Temperature: -3 C to 2 C
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