Not an ounce of fat on the lad
I weighed 10-and-a-half stone for more than 10 years.
It didn't matter how much I ate or how much exercise I had, the scales always told the same story.
Such was the monotony that I gave up weighing myself until about seven years ago.
Imagine my horror to find my weight had changed drastically. And not in a good way.
Since then, I take far more interest in what I eat and try to take more exercise.
My pathetic efforts have so far proved futile.
My weight is a worry. To my sons, it's a joke.
The expansion of my girth is a cause for much merriment, especially for Isaac, who is very difficult to see sideways on.
He has always been thin, not an ounce of fat on the lad.
His problem, however, will be that I was exactly the same at his age, and look how I've turned out.
Gabriel, on the other hand, started with puppy fat that took a while to disppear.
He's now a fine figure of a young man, and the two of them together put me to shame.
The answer has to be a diet. I'll start it after Christmas.
We had to buy Gabriel some new shoes this week.
He is 13 years old and now needs a size nine shoe.
His feet are already far bigger than his mother's and at this rate, he and I will be sharing shoes this time next year.
At least when we reach that point our shoes bill may reduce – I do owe more than one pair.
This will only be a temporary measure, as he'll soon outgrow me.
My mother used to call my shoes ferry boats.
By the time he's finished growing, Gabriel's footwear is more likely to resemble aircraft carriers.
My wife is incredibly well organised.
So it did not surprise me this week when she informed me that Christmas was in the bag.
Presents were not only bought, they were wrapped.
All that's left are those that Santa himself may bring.
Of course, she has made certain assumptions, like Isaac won't change his mind about what he wants.
Unfortunately, Isaac will change his mind at least twice in the five weeks left before Christmas Day.
Gabriel won't change his mind – indeed, Gabriel can't change his mind.
He had his Christmas present in June.
I hope he's remembered, because we certainly have.
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Weather for Sunderland
Thursday 24 May 2012
Today
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